Expectations. We all have them. What is revealed in our hearts when our expectations are not met, is a clear picture to us of something that needs to be pruned, something that God wants to cut away so we can be more like Him. Is that not our goal? To be more like Jesus? 1,000% YES! Sometimes, however, we do not enjoy the opportunities God gives us to learn these lessons. This week alone I have encountered a number of unmet expectations. I wish I could tell you that I was filled with joy and not frustrated with each opportunity to trust the Lord in all of these unmet expectations.
Proverbs 19:21 says, “Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.”
At the beginning of each week, I have a list of things that need to be accomplished. I usually have another list broken down for each day of said week. It is all going to work out perfectly, I think to myself. As long as I can check off each item on the list, my plan will succeed. I am sure you are chuckling to yourself because you know how this can play out. Just for fun, let us go there for a minute.
We have a plan. It is a really good one. There are many things that can change that plan in an instant. Am I right? A child wakes up in the middle of the night with a fever. Your car breaks down on the side of the road on the way to an appointment. You sit down to get some work done and someone calls you with an emergency. You are walking out the door on time and you spill your coffee all over yourself and the kitchen. These are just a few things that can derail our daily plans.
This does not even touch the bigger things. Things like not getting into the college you have dreamed about for years. What about when you apply for a job and you don’t get it, or you are sure you are getting a promotion and it is given to someone else? What happens when someone dies or when you get a life-altering medical diagnosis? We don’t plan for or expect these things. If we are not careful, our heart can be hardened to God and His plan for our lives when we don’t submit to His will. I am not saying that we aren’t allowed to be disappointed or even angry when things don’t play out the way we planned. We are all human. We will be disappointed and sad and angry. What God has continued to bring to my heart this week is to remember that His plan is perfect. He is working things out in ways we cannot see. He is molding us into His image. He truly knows best.
Ephesians 3:20-21 “Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever, Amen.”
During the holidays it seems that our expectations are magnified. We want to get the perfect gift for our children and spouse. We want to experience all the fun things that this time of year brings. The lights, the cookies, the parties. Even now, when I am typing this out my brain immediately goes to all of the things I want to get done before the end of the week. The Lord has been knocking on my heart all week. Each time something happens that is not going the way I planned, He quickens my heart. He reminds me that I can trust Him. He allows me to see something or someone that needs help when I find myself on this unexpected path. My prayer has been for me to have listening ears when God tells me that I am focusing on the wrong thing. I want to grow to be more like Him. I want to find myself reacting to circumstances out of my control with the fruit of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, goodness, self-control). I want to start each day with a prayer that goes something like this,
“Lord, I give you my day. I submit my plans to you. You are sovereign and know so much more than I can even begin to know. When things happen that are out of my control, help me to bring them to you. Help me to understand that when I submit my day to you, I am opening myself up for you to use me. Thank you for your discipline. Thank you for loving me enough to show grace when I mess up and mess up BIG. I love you, Amen.”
Sometimes we have our minds so set on what we are expecting that we miss what Jesus has for us. It might be right in front of us, and we can’t see it. Jesus was the fulfillment of all the prophecies, but because He didn’t look like what they expected, they rejected Him.
Mary was a teenage girl, probably not who you and I would have expected to carry the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.
Moses was chosen to speak up for an entire people group, and he had a speech impediment. Not who we would expect to get the job done.
David was just a shepherd boy. We would expect God to choose one of his older and stronger brothers to be king. Again, not what we would expect.
God chose to use all kinds of unlikely people to fulfill His plans. I do not want to miss Jesus because I am so distracted by my own plans. When you look at these things with the lens of Kingdom purpose and the gospel, it all changes. Suddenly, it does not matter that I can’t find matching Christmas pajamas for my whole family. I have been convicted by this so much this week alone. Maybe you are reading this, and your week has gone exactly according to plan. You can still ask God to see something that you do not.
Maybe you are the exact opposite and all of the things you have tried to accomplish have failed. This does not define you. Allow the Holy Spirit to change your heart and to be open to what He has for your day and for next year. He wants our expectations to line up with Him and His plans. If you find yourself constantly disappointed because things are not going according to your expectations, I challenge you to surrender to God and His plan for your life. When you do, you experience peace. God promises that to us when we trust Him.
John 14:27 “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”
Written by: Taran Nelson. Taran is the Executive Director of Fathom Family Foundation and serves in ministry with her husband, Rev. Kyle, and their three children in Jacksonville, FL.