I hold a lot of jobs. Some of them I even get paid for. I am (by trade) an orchestral musician, teacher, and performer. I am also a music pastor’s wife, and as such, share in some of the duties of that job – helping my husband with our ministry, conducting, running rehearsals, editing charts, etc. But by far the biggest job I have is as a stay-at-home mom.
As a stay-at-home mom I run the day-to-day taking care of our household as well as all things kid-related, everything from researching allergy-free recipes for my youngest son to school schedules and homework for my older two. Every other job I have plays second fiddle to this one. Often times this job can feel overwhelming and even a bit lonely. Staying home from church to take care of your kid with the sniffles, being up all night with the baby so you’re too exhausted for morning devotionals, missing out on ministry trips because there’s no sitter – these types of scenarios can sometimes leave you with the sense that it is now your lot to be the “Martha” in the home.
In Luke chapter 10, Jesus visits the home of Mary and Martha. You know the story… Martha complains about having to do all the work, but Jesus corrects her saying Mary is doing what she should. (Kristin’s very loose translation.) For the longest time I had such an issue with this story! After all, the meal still had to be made, they still ate, there was still preparation and cleanup that had to happen – stuff still had to get done. My organized, hospitable, type A personality totally sided with Martha in this story! Over the years (especially as a mom) I have found some insight beyond my own initial indignation, and I hope this will encourage somebody today.
First of all, I would like to point out that what Martha is doing is in fact valuable and necessary. If you are in a time of life where you are busy with the necessary, then be encouraged. The point of this story is not to diminish the work of your hands or to beat you up mentally for handling the everyday tasks. Jesus and the disciples were in-fact there to eat, to relax, and to share fellowship. I think it’s kind of easy to fall into the trap of condemning Martha for actually doing the work, and I want to point out that the work is not something to skip.
Second, I’d like to point out that Jesus came to their house. Mary and Martha didn’t have to go looking for him. He was invited, and He showed up right where they were, in the middle of the work. He came to them. Often times as moms we have to miss other things to be where we are most needed with our children, and it’s tempting to feel sort of abandoned. But there is such a special grace of his presence to be found during these times! Invite Him in and He is faithful to show up.
The third thing I want to say is that the issue Jesus pointed out to Martha wasn’t with the work or with her location, but it was with her heart. Martha had allowed the work to become her focus and her first priority, and in doing so, it made her bitter and resentful. She viewed Jesus’s presence as an interruption instead of a blessing – an interruption which took her sister’s attention away from the task at hand and therefore she treated it like an inconvenience. No, the work should not be skipped, but if the heart behind it is bitter, then the work becomes displeasing to the Lord and ultimately less fruitful than it could be. No, they did not have to leave and go to the tabernacle or go search for Jesus, but if His presence becomes an inconvenient interruption instead of a blessing to take encouragement and gain wisdom from, then the fellowship is tainted, and the result is rebuke.
Matthew 6 tells us to “seek first His kingdom and righteousness,” and all these things will be added. Trust that the Lord knows what work needs to get done. (After all, He was the one who called you and equipped you to do it in the first place.) But don’t get so focused on working for Him that you neglect time with Him. If I did all my children’s laundry, cooked every meal, cleaned every surface – but didn’t read to them, cuddle them, kiss their boo-boo’s, talk about their days, and spend quality time with them, it would not be a healthy and happy relationship. The work matters. The heart behind the work matters more. Is the work turning sour? Is there bitterness and resentfulness growing? Are you irritated by a spiritual interruption? Seek God first! He is ready with grace to receive you, faithful to forgive, and wanting to help you in the work.
– Written by: Kristin Kusic, Jacksonville, FL
Pastors wife, musician, writer, mother to three incredible children.
