Psalm 23: 1-6 The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for His name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

Just as swiftly as it came, the Christmas season is gone, and another year has begun. Each year that passes seems to go faster, just like all the grandmas tell us. With the rapid growth of advertisement literally in our pockets, we are bombarded by this notion that more is best. We are told literally thousands of times per day that we need to buy this or that, or we need to subscribe to the next great thing. Although these things are not bad in and of themselves, we get caught in the trap of needing and wanting more only to leave us feeling dissatisfied and discontent. Just like clockwork at this time of year, however, we find ourselves cleaning out closets and drawers that are filled with things that we just “had to have” only to be replaced with the next best thing. It is a cycle that will repeat itself until we stop it.

My point here is that none of this stuff satisfies. We should not focus all our efforts on what we don’t have and, instead, take a moment to look around at what God has provided for us and our family. I always come out of my rut of discontentment when I stop and thank God for what I have. I don’t know about you, but something that punches me in the gut is when I start seeing something that I struggle with play out in my own children’s lives. You see, we don’t just get closer to God and his ways for our own selves. We draw near to Him and become dependent on Him so that we can be a witness for Him to others. Our kids see our lives and they are watching. If we are constantly asking them to be content just so they will stop whining, but we are not content ourselves, they know. Have you ever heard the phrase, “more is caught than taught”? It is so true. The way we live, the things we complain about, the stuff we place high value on are all things that our children take mental notes on and take action on as well.  As children of God, we are constantly promised that when we trust the Lord He will take care of us. It is time for this to be the year that we believe that and model it for our families. The constant yearning for more actually leaves us emptier.

Sometimes I read posts like this and I feel challenged and then do nothing about it. Let’s change that. Here are some action steps you can take to help your heart stop the constant dripping of discontentment.

1. Admit that you are not content. This is a hard one. We can often name a long list of people that we think are discontent with their lives but refuse to look in the mirror at ourselves. Once you can admit that this is a place where you struggle, you can make steps towards freedom in this area.

2. Ask a friend or family member to hold you accountable (one that you really know will call you out). One time I told my kids that I knew I was having a hard time with screen time on my phone and gave them full permission to call me out if they caught me mindlessly scrolling. Let me just tell you, they held me accountable! You need people like this in your life. Surround yourself with like-minded friends that will lovingly help you grow.

3. Start looking around and make a list of things you are grateful for. We started a gratitude journal in our house and this simple act truly changed my perspective almost immediately.

4. Dive into scripture about contentment. It is pretty easy to do a topical search online. As you find scriptures that encourage or convict you, write them on a notecard and place it somewhere that you will see it often. If you struggle with feeling like you never have anything to wear, put this scripture in your closet. If you find yourself complaining about not having a brand new car, put the notecard in the dashboard of your current car. When we focus on the truth of God’s Word and not what we are feeling in the moment, it truly makes a difference.

5. Pray and ask God to change your heart. This sounds simple, but God wants our honesty. He gives us free will so that we can make decisions on our own. Be honest with him. Pour your heart out and tell him that this is an area where you want to grow. Allow him to respond. He will begin to prune things away from your heart that is causing you to hang on to this discontentment, and before you know it, you will begin to feel freedom.

6. Challenge yourself to an exercise “no unnecessary or compulsive purchases for a month.” You will be surprised to find that when you place limits on yourself, you don’t really miss it as much as you thought you would. Sometimes you are just making purchases out of habit.  If you have an app on your phone that tempts you towards jealousy or compulsive buying, remove it.

Here are some good scriptures for you to read, write down, and maybe you even need to memorize them. Feel free to look for more.

• I Timothy 6:6-7, “But godliness with contentment is great gain,for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world.”
• 2 Corinthians 12:10, “For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
• Hebrews 13:5, “Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”
• Matthew 6:33, “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”
• Matthew 6:25-26, “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?”

Written by: Taran Nelson. Taran is the Executive Director of Fathom Family Foundation and serves in ministry with her husband, Rev. Kyle, and their three children in Jacksonville, FL.