This post was first published on December 28, 2022.
Well, it’s a few days after Christmas. We spent the last weeks preparing to celebrate the birth of the Christ child. This celebration has brought us together with friends and family. We’ve attended parties, plays, concerts, and worship services. Now that Christmas day has passed, we continue to reflect on the meaning of it all. It’s during this time that we remember the violence of the slaughter of the infant babes of Bethlehem, and we ponder the journey of the wisemen seeking the king of the Jews. Also, this is a time that we should reflect on the significance of the Holy Family – Joseph, Mary, and Jesus – and how they model a godly family for us to imitate.
We remember Mary as the one who was utterly faithful and obedient to the call of God. When reflecting on Mary, early Christians often compared her to Eve who was created in perfection and lived in a garden, but succumbed to the temptations of the serpent. On the other hand, Mary was born into sin, lived in a harsh environment, was oppressed by Roman armies, but proved to be faithful to God. So, as Eve is remembered as the mother of the living, Mary is remembered as the mother of the faithful.
We remember Joseph as a just man. When he discovered Mary’s pregnancy and suspected that she was adulterous, he chose mercy. He could have prosecuted Mary and had her executed. Instead, he intended to put her away secretly. In other words, he refused to publicly shame Mary. Of course, the visit from the angel changed his entire perspective. Joseph realized that Mary was not adulterous, but an exceptionally favored woman of God.
Whereas Adam and Eve are the originators of humanity, Joseph and Mary embody the ideal of a new humanity. Because of the disobedience of Adam and Eve, all creation has been corrupted by sin and death. However, because of the faithfulness of Joseph and Mary all creation anticipates New Creation and eternal life through the son of Mary.
Then there is the child of Mary – Jesus. He is the savior of humanity, the anointed one of God, and the ruler of the kings of the earth. He was conceived in the womb of Mary by the power and presence of the Holy Spirit. The eternal and uncreated Son emptied himself, descended from glory to inhabit the womb of Mary and be united with human nature. The child born of Mary is fully and perfectly human, and fully and perfectly divine. He has come to defeat the work of the devil, to liberate humanity and unite humanity with the eternal glory and life of God. Joy to the world!
The Holy Family is an exemplary model of humanity. God created humans in the divine image, male and female God created them. Male and female are equally human and share the divine image. They were created to rule the earth together and to worship God together (Genesis 1:26-27). Male and female are equally human, but biologically distinct. That distinctiveness is demonstrated in God’s call for them to be fruitful and multiply. Fruitfulness requires the distinction of sex. Human flourishing requires the joy of love as expressed in heterosexual coupling. The fruit of that coupling is children. Children are a blessing from the Lord (Psalm 127:3).
This model of the human family, known as the nuclear family, is under attack. In fact, it has been under attack for decades. It begin with the sexual revolution in the 1960s. It continued with the proliferation of no-fault divorce in the 1970s. It continues today with the advances of the LGBTQ movement. The result of deconstructing the nuclear family is that more children are born to unwed mothers, more women and children suffer from poverty, and emerging generations are struggling with self-identity and loneliness.
Sociological studies have demonstrated that humans are happier, safer, and more prosperous when the nuclear family is the foundation of society (see here, here, and here). This is true among all cultures. In fact, the nuclear family is a common grace. Common grace is the blessing of God bestowed upon all humans – saint and sinner alike. Jesus said that God gives sun and rain to the evil and good alike (Matthew 5:45). The nuclear family is a blessing to all humans – Christians and Muslims; European, African, and Asian; male and female.
This is not to imply that marriage is easy, or that rearing children is easy. All of us have been corrupted by sin, all humans are broken. Marriage is the coming together of two broken humans, a broken male and a broken female. Likewise, the children of their union are broken. Therefore, there can be no perfect marriage, and no perfect family. Even so, the nuclear family is the most basic human community in which we encounter the saving grace of God.
Marriage and parenting are demanding. A holy family demands mutual cooperation, mercy, and patience. Mutual cooperation is mutual submission, mutual love, and mutual respect (Ephesians 5:21-33). Family life demands mercy, because all relationships can be painful. People we love will hurt us, and we will hurt people we love. We must choose to exercise the mercy of forgiveness. Love is patient and kind (1 Corinthians 13:4). To be patient is to be long-suffering – to be willing to suffer long with people we love. At its best, the family is the place where we are nourished in love and faith.
Again, let’s look to Mary and Joseph. The gospel of Luke tells us that when Jesus was eight days old Mary and Joseph presented him to the Lord to be circumcised and named (Luke 2:21). Mary and Joseph continued to demonstrate their faithfulness to God. By presenting Jesus to be circumcised, they were demonstrating fidelity to the covenant between God and Abraham. By calling his name Jesus, they were remaining faithful to the command of the angel of the Lord. In their example, we discover that our faith traditions are the foundation of family flourishing (Exodus 12:26-27; Deuteronomy 6:4-8; 2 Timothy 1:5-6). Moms and dads need to bring their children into the presence of God every day and every Lord’s day (Hebrews 10:25).
One final thought – the Holy Family was a blended family. Joseph was Jesus’ stepfather. While we should be careful not to excuse the brokenness of our own lives, the Holy Family is a model of God’s redeeming grace. Many Christians have suffered from divorce and subsequently remarry, often bringing children into the marriage. Joseph is a model stepparent. He loved, protected, and reared Jesus as his own child. God’s grace means that our brokenness may be healed by the righteousness of Christ (2 Corinthians 5:21).
Dan Tomberlin, DMin. Dr. Tomberlin is an Assistant Professor of Pastoral Ministries at Pentecostal Theological Seminary in Cleveland, TN.
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